It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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