so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
