he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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