OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
