And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
