Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
