Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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