im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
