I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize