Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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