I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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