Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
