I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
There r osticjed everywhere
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
