turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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