I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize