Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
