I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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