: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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