I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Michael Bay diarrhea
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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