Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I have aggressive nipples.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
