well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
