I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Terrible idea I love it
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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