? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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