Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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