When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.