I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO