She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it