BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
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Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
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Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.