I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
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I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
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Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!