I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.