Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
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You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.