he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.