So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
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so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
15 Things You’ll Miss About College – and 7 Things You Definitely Won’t
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
There is a Children’s Book About Donald Trump’s Hair, and it’s as Weird as You’d Expect It to Be