It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.