boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away