2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub