he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.