He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?