and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.