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I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
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