Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it