Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom