there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I told you penises don't tan
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.