He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.