Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
was it more than 30 minutes?
then you're in a relationship