I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years