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On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
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