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This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
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