so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up