My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.