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Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
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