I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?